I am a 70 years old woman . I was arguing with my husband over petty things untill I got so fed up and left for the kitchen . '' I love you . . . " he called out to me but I didn't bother to reply . I made a cup of coffee then suddenly my mind wondered off to my younger days to which I smile at . . .
I remembered having my first boyfriend during high school . He was like my Johnny Cash while I am his June . I remembered kissing for the first time in his Mustang . I loved him very much then . I remembered we would go to his attic and sketch pictures of each other but his was better than mine . I remembered he would do anything I wanted to do even making a tattoo for me . I remembered us stealing some liqour in my dad's cupboard and snucked up to the roof to drink . We would talk of our ambitious , the future and about us like getting married and to live happily ever after till we are old . But I never thought that we won't be together long .
On my 18 birthday , we went to a dance at the local hall . we danced all night long . i went over to his place for the night once the dance was over .
'' hey cathy , do you want me to do your tattoo for you ? '' He asked
'' okay , let's do it . . . '' i giggled
Let me tell you , its hurts so bad when he did the tattoo . he would kiss me every now and then . he kisses somehow soothes the pain . by next morning , we both had matching tattoos on our arms .
now my hands and arms are wrinkled , but i could still see the faded tattoo on my left wrist . i suddenly felt sad . i went up to the bedroom and locked myself in there . the memories of him suddenly came back . . .
our relationship together are not all the time good . there are bittersweet moments too . after nearing our second year together , our relationship suddenly became sour . he would get pissed off easily and i would be mad of him for a long time . there was once i really mad him pissed and that cost his life .
we were fighting quite badly and splashed one of his paintings with red ink . he got even more mad and left the place in the middle of the storm . i decided to just sleep and cool off .
the next morning , he didn't came back . i waited till noon and went over to his parent's home to find him . when i got there , his mum answered the door . his mum was crying . i gave her a hug and asked her what was wrong .
'' Dave . . . He died . . . ''
i couldn't believe what i have just heard . '' that can't be . . . '' i whispered .
his mum told me bit by bit through all the tears .
Dave was driving in the middle of the night . dave was driving in the rain . dave was tring to drive past the boulder in the middle of the road . dave's car skidded and flew from the cliff . Dave's car caught fire . dave died .
i couldn't believe what she had said . deep down , i know his death was my fault , all my fault . i went back home and cried for months in guilt .
now , thinking back of dave , i couldn't help but cry . i love him and still do even though i am married now . i took my car keys and drove to the cliffside . there , i couldn't help but just cry . whenever i closed my eyes , i could feel dave hugging me .
'' dave , i miss you . . . and i'm sorry . . . ''